GUEST POST: Pure Worth by Nikki Washington

GUEST POST:  Each month, we will have a Guest Post from a leader with a passion for purity and teens.  Keep watching for it the last Friday of the month.  This month, we welcome Nikki Washington.  Enjoy!

She boasted, “I told him all about you!”  In her best southern accent, she squealed, “I told him you’re saved, sanctified, spirit-filled and never touched by man’s hands.  That’s right honey, I told him you’re a virgin!”  I’ll never forget when a church friend and mother came to me after a gentleman expressed some interest in me.  I know she meant well, but it was simply an awkward moment for me.  In short, she was selling me to this male suitor like I was some shiny new Geo Metro.  I could hear the commercial, “Brand new! No miles! All credit is approved! Everything must go!” Okay now I’m being silly, but you get the picture.

Early in my walk with God, I began to learn about my worth as a woman in Christ.  I began to understand what my mom couldn’t teach me and my dad wasn’t there to say to me.  I found my value far exceeded any monetary amount.  I learned I was a gift, and my body, a temple.  I was too valuable to give “it” up in exchange for dinner and a movie, or sly grins and whispers of sweet nothings.  I learned how to honor God with all of me so that He would receive glory.  And don’t get it twisted, I’m not saying it’s always been easy… but it has always been worth it.

Let me challenge you to begin to study and find out what God says about you.  Don’t let someone who didn’t create you define you.  Knowing who you are in God comes with endless benefits.  When you know your worth, you won’t give away what God has ordained for your spouse.  When you know your worth, you won’t allow someone to treat you with disdain or disrespect.  When you know your worth, you won’t settle for less than God’s best for your life.  Make a decision today to not give yourself to anyone who’s not your spouse.  Wait for God to unite you with the one He has for you.  I know it’s easier said than done, but I’m talking about what I know, not just what I’ve heard.  Even if you haven’t waited, you can make a decision to give all of yourself to God.  Try it, and watch Him wipe the slate clean.

The old saints use to say, “God will keep you if you want to be kept!”  I can attest to that.  Truthfully speaking, there were times God kept me even when I didn’t want to be kept (thank you Jesus).  And it doesn’t matter if you’ve made mistakes in the past, the wonderful thing about God is that you can start over again.  Sis, you don’t have to give yourself away anymore, you’re too good for that.  When God made you He made you fearfully and wonderfully.  There’s something to be said about the glow of a woman who has been in intimate worship with the Father.  Allow God to give you a different type of afterglow.  Take it from me, a 33 year old virgin: purity’s so worth it and you are too!

Nikki Washington is an abstinence advocate and the founder of thechastitybelt.org, a blog site dedicated to purity.  For more information, you can contact Nikki at thechastitybelt2010@gmail.com.

Thanks Nikki for sharing your heart with us this month.  I love the challenge you issued to our girls to search for their true worth.  Great message!

Have you met HER?

Wisdom… Lot’s of people wish they had met her.  The ones that know her consider her to be one of their very best friends.  She’s available every place you go, alone or in a group, young or wishing you were young again.  Your level of education or social status cannot keep you away from her or gain access to her.  Wisdom doesn’t discriminate, however, you must seek her out. She’s classy, timeless and a devoted friend.  Tonight, we talked about her in our small group, and here’s a little I learned about her:

Wisdom is defined as knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgement as to action; discernment or insight.  Wisdom is considered the opposite of ignorance or stupidity, and doesn’t mean the same as conceit.

I love the book of Proverbs…especially Proverbs 31.  It’s one of my many favorite chapters of the Bible.  However, all 31 chapters are loaded with much about Wisdom. If you want to grow in this area, one way is to read a chapter a day from Proverbs.  You’ll read through the entire book in just one short month.  You can also meet her through the words of godly men and women in your life, your parents (yes, they know more about Wisdom than you think), listening to sermons/podcasts, and by reading other great books.  With all of that in mind, the best way to find Wisdom is through prayer and reading God’s Word (the Bible).  God has much to share with you about Wisdom.  Sometimes Wisdom comes through studying His Word (God’s message for us) and other times He speaks it directly through His Holy Spirit. You can take it or leave it.  God doesn’t force Wisdom upon you, but you can be sure that making decisions on your own without Wisdom will catch up with you eventually.  It’s like driving down a busy one-way road in the wrong direction…sooner or later, you’ll end up in a head-on collision with your own consequences.  When we make bad decisions, sometimes those consequences can be pretty deep and painful.  Take it from me…I wish I had listened to Wisdom.  She could have kept me from a great deal of self-inflicted heart-ache in my younger years.  Oh, I learned from my mistakes alright.  What I didn’t know was I didn’t have to learn those lessons the hard way.  The world likes to smooth over ignorance with excuses like “I’ve got to learn for myself” or “The only way I can learn is by making mistakes.”  What a lie! I could  have taken the easy path and spared myself so much guilt, shame and condemnation had I simply listened to Wisdom.

I encourage you to take the Proverbs Challenge.  Read a chapter a day of Proverbs over the next month and see if God speaks to you about Wisdom in your own situations.  Just try it out.  Leave some comments about what God is revealing to you about Wisdom. Regardless of where you’ve been in life, it’s never too late to seek her.  Just ask God.  He’s ready to help you.

Now if any of you lack wisdom, he should ask GOD, who gives to all generously and without criticizing, and it will be given to him.  James 1:5

Questions:  Why should I want Wisdom?  How can I get (more) Wisdom in my own life?  What do I have to gain from Wisdom?

When Necessary, Use Words

Recently, the question was asked about “teen pregnancy and generational curses”…very deep stuff to think about for this analytical mind.  By no means do I have all of the answers, but after some discussion and prayer, I do believe teens make decisions of their own free will that create consequences.  Some families struggle in certain areas of weakness where others may not.  Some consequences are deeper than others.  Some are easy to disguise, while others cannot be hidden.  All families have struggles; don’t be fooled.

Regardless of your family history, the best defense you have as a parent is to equip yourself.  Dig into God’s Word daily and talk often with your child.  The discussion of purity is not an “ok, we had this talk. Now you know.” kind-of discussion.  Please do not expect one chat to equip your child for life in today’s anything goes society.  Today’s young people need to see their parents walking out what they speak daily.  Share your journey with your child, tell them about some of your struggles (not all…don’t unpack your whole life on them) and your goals, and encourage, encourage, encourage them.  Be their biggest cheerleader, and pray for them daily.  Remember, someone is speaking the opposite of purity to your students 24/7 (TV, internet, friends, social media, etc).  It’s our job as parents to make sure they hear the truth about life and purity, and to equip them with the tools they need in life.  Put your students in a safe atmosphere (connect groups, youth ministries, church, etc) where they can be fitted with the gear they need for life.  However, it’s ultimately up to them to put these tools into practice as teens and young adults.  Sadly, some will choose not to and face serious consequences, but don’t let that be an excuse to look the other way.

YOU ARE the best teacher your student will ever have regardless of what anyone says.  Every day, your child is learning something from you through your actions.  If you feel your life isn’t a good example, don’t give up…you can change that.  It doesn’t mean perfection. Set a goal to improve.  Simply make the changes you need to make in your life and be honest with your child in your journey.  Make the best of your situation.  Ask God for help.  Find a good devotional or Bible study, get connected in a local church, and surround yourself with a support network.  Improving your child’s view of you is one of the greatest gifts you can give them.  As Francis of Assisi would say, “If God can work through me, He can work through anyone.”  I feel that way every day.  Lead your child by your actions and when necessary use words.  You’ve got this!

For more encouragement, see the PARENT link at www.conniefirmin.com.